May 2013
shalrath:
“Young woman, please fix your bra, I can see it”, the teacher says to the student. “But miss, this is not a bra, this is a bathing suit top!”, she exclaims. For some reason, teacher takes this as a legit excuse, since for some reason bathing suits aren’t as controversial as underwear is despite there is literally no difference between them. The crisis is averted. The apocalypse of...
ficlet: an improbable ammonite
ceruleancynic:
For Laylah.
You wake up with the drowsy awareness of having slept luxuriously late, and stay curled in the warmth of the slime for exactly as long as it takes your brain to cycle through the elapsed time and open up your memories of the previous night.
When your mental clock resets you sit bolt upright in the cupe, which has the normal result of making your butt sink and your...
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babybehemoth:
Anxiety attacks are the worst because sometimes you have no idea why you’re crying or angry and you just think of everything wrong in your life and you can’t control it all you can do is breath in and out and cry it out
agentbartowski:
me: [ten chapters into a fanfic] i think i’ve read this before
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[[MORE]]Every time I listen to Miss Missing You by Fall Out Boy I dissolve into this hysterical crying fit. Pretty much solely because of the line “The person that you’d take a bullet for is behind the trigger.” And I just. What the hell am I going to do when we go to the concert, this will not do.
OH MY GOD.
oogamisackura:
Oh my god i just realized The ‘Heart’ symbol for Homestuck
See how it’s only half colored in and its separated from the other half. Dirk’s ‘other half’ was Jake, and they had a particularly messy breakup. Nepeta gave her heart to Karkat, only to be rejected. Meulin’s redboyfriend Kurloz hurt her by turning her deaf in the great honk. Heart players give a part of their...
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warbloggerofzillyhoo:
thesherlockfandomisbroken:
smith-and-noble:
samandpatricks:
today my best friend asked me “why cinderella’s shoe fell off if it fit her perfectly”
In the original story the prince ordered one of his servants to put liquid tar on the staircase to stop her from running away. The shoe got stuck on the tar.
That is a liiiiittle bit creepy
LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT...
oohtheyhavenibbles:
bonesbuckleup:
So today I learned that Eucalyptus leaves have this chemical in them and when koalas eat the leaves the chemical makes them drunk but since koalas only eat Eucalyptus leaves they basically go through their entire lives perpetually smashed.
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plot twist: yahoo buys tumblr and we get proper blocking features, lockable posts, a sent folder in messages/fanmail with a better interface, ability to search multiple tags, removal of the post and message limits, proper search engines for likes/archives and removing that bloody "reblog as a link" option.
heartcramp:
Look, if you nicely tell me that swearing makes you uncomfortable and you politely ask me not to, I will stop immediately and speak nicer than a nun.
But if you start acting like you’re on some fucking high horse, or telling me that I’m going to Hell for talking the way that I do and you can’t “be around that kind of language” then you can bet your motherfuckin’ ass that I’ll be...
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[[MORE]]Ok, I just need to set things straight. There’s a reason why I don’t want to be around you anymore. Really, there is. I’m not just being spiteful, and heartbroken, though that might be part of it. I don’t know how well I’m doing with making other people happy, and you know how much that means to me. All I know is that I’m not happy, not at all. I know...
do u ever just make scenarios in your head that will never happen but makes you so happy so you just keep on imagining them
I did the Pokemon fusion thing.
noxxigirl:
I got a couple of cool ones
Then I got a not so cool one.
“All of life is an act of letting go.”
– Pi [Life of Pi] (via quiquote)
arisaavena:
hiddledbythebatch:
territorialcreep:
rusharound:
atomiccrowbars:
stitchedego:
thebaronofthebells:
liking someone who is already in a relationship
Liking someone who likes you back, but they’re already in a relationship
Liking someone who doesn’t like you back
Liking someone who doesn’t exist.
Liking someone
Liking yourself
this easily became the...
conchfishscates:
‘big boobs don’t count if you’re fat’
yeah well bIG DICKS DONT COUNT IF YOU ARE ONE
smilingeridan:
thanks for the suggestion anon this fusion is uNF
